Thursday, November 19, 2009

Really? That's What It Took?

Have you ever wondered why it's so hard to make yourself  your husband get up, grab whatever manly tool is required and repair things that have been staring him you in the face for weeks, months, or more likely, years?  You know, things like a toilet that sounds like a bull moose in heat whenever you flush it.  Okay, I haven't actually heard a bull moose in heat, but ...  oh, wait, that would be because only women moose, women mooses, a woman moose would go into heat.  I meant a bull moose making those manly bull moose sounds to attract a female moose in heat.  Like she would really be attracted to some big-nosed, ugly, bellowing, clumsy moose who thinks he's mother nature's gift to ungulates.  She just wants baby mooses.

And then there are things like fences with planks (or whatever those straight up-and-down parts are that keep your neighbor's dog out of your yard and garden) that are so old that on occasion one or more of them just decides to fall over and leave a big hole in your fence.  Did you know yellow labs love pumpkins?  Oh, and some people have stacks of paving stones neatly stacked next to a nice big area of dirt (formerly known as grass) just waiting for the perfect moment to create the perfect path.

And there's the  painting and staining which always seems to take a back seat to more important things like gardening or rocks or did I mention gardening?

What is the secret?  What does it take to get that ever-growing list of projects crossed off the to-do list?  I've put a fair amount of time into thinking about this and I've come up with a few solutions.  One of those is to decide it just isn't worth doing.  Cross it off like it never existed and lessen the guilt.  So what if the toilet sings?  Maybe it's a method of water conservation.  You know, if it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown flush it down

Then there's the just wait solution.  If you wait long enough, somebody will take care of it for you.  The guilt your neighbor will feel after their dog has brought home 15 pumpkins from your garden through a hole in the fence is an amazing stimulant to fence replacement.  Paying for half the wood will ease the guilt you your husband feels because the week the fence is rebuilt he is forced to work late every night.

But the solution that never entered my brain, not even in my wildest imagination, that caused me to open my eyes in wide but happy surprise is this.  Point out that in a very short time your daughter will be bringing her beloved fiance home for Christmas.   I know.  I'm shaking my head in wonder and amazement right along with you.  It's only been three years but yes, we now have a kitchen with painted walls.  And not only that, I've heard whispers that soon there will also be real stuff, like things in frames, hanging on those newly painted walls.


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